4am zoomies: the bane of any cat owner’s existence. We’d love to tell you we have the secret to eliminating the banging and crashing, face trampling, and bellowing meows in the middle of the night. But cats are, despite the adorableness, nocturnal maniacs, so.
What we can tell you is that there are a bunch of tactics you can use to minimise the zoomies.
Schedule a play sesh a couple of hours before bed
Everyone knows dogs need to be walked daily, lest they destroy your home and everything you’ve ever loved. While most cats are pretty off the idea of walkies — the traditional kind with the collar and lead — they still need that structured energy release.
Schedule in afternoon or night-time playtime with your cat, ideally a couple of hours before you head to bed. Find your cat’s preferred game — fish on a stick, laser pointer, the jingly balls, and help them release some of their energy.
It’s more ideal for your cat to have a few short 5-10 minute play sessions are day, rather than a big 30 minute session. Plus… you probably won’t hold their attention for that long.
Remember, cats are sore losers
It’s important you let your cat win a few times throughout the play sesh. Make sure they catch or grab the toy at the end each time. If you’re using a light-based game like a laser pointer or using shadows, it can be better for your cat if you drop a treat and shine the light on it so they actually catch something at the end.
Firstly, your cat will be way less likely to keep playing if they never win or catch the toy, because they’re big dumb babies.
Secondly, not winning can build pent up frustration in your cat.
“Cats are left frustrated, without the opportunity to feel the tactile sensation of their hard-earned prey,” says cat behaviourist, Marilyn Krieger on laser pointer games.
“Felines need to have the satisfaction of the hunt — to catch and feel their prey beneath their paws.”
Rotate their toys and leave them all around the house
Cats can get bored of playing with the same toys all the time. Rotate their toys to give the illusion of fresh and exciting toys.
Create three or four “groups” of toys, each with a variety your cat loves. So, a plush toy, a ball, scrunched up foil… your Flappy Fish 😉
Then just swap the toys out weekly, you know what they say… Variety is the spice of life.
Make sure their biggest meal (dinner) is at night
Cat behaviourists recommend playing with your cat at night and then making sure to feed them a big, protein rich dinner after the play sesh. Your cat is a hunter and playing with them simulates hunting prey, chasing prey, and then killing said prey.
So, feeding them dinner then simulates the whole ~eating their prey~ bit — even though you just pulled a can out of the cupboard.
Plus, a big feed is usually the perfect setup for a nice long nap.
Make sure your Flappy Fish is fully charged before bed
Chuck your Flappy Fish on charge an hour away from bedtime and put it in your cat’s zoomie hotspot or zoomie path. So, if your hallway is usually the enabler for their insanity, leave your Flappy Fish halfway down it for a neat distraction while you’re trying to sleep.
Accept that 4am zoomies are a part of the job
You can definitely use all the above tips to minimise the face trampling, the knocking over of all your stuff, and the general 4am chaos that goes on.
Buuuuut, zoomies are a part of the job and in most cases, it’s a sign of a healthy, playful cat.
“If cats are merely running and jumping around for five minutes, it’s not necessary to stop the cat,” says Dr. Erin Wilson, a veterinarian and medical director for New York’s ASPCA told PetMD. “It’s the same as stopping children from running and playing.”
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Failing everything else, make sure your Flappy Fish is positioned nicely before bed 😉
